


The Line

by DRHPaints



Category: Bill Hader - Fandom, The Line - Fandom
Genre: Established Relationship, Exhibitionism, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Future Space, Hand Jobs, One Shot, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Smut, Star Wars References, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, the line
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-04
Updated: 2020-12-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:00:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27873441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DRHPaints/pseuds/DRHPaints
Summary: When Josh's girlfriend Gwendolyn joins him for the last night of waiting before the Future Space movie premiere, the two of them get revved up beneath the sleeping bag after spending so many days apart.
Relationships: Josh/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 5





	The Line

**Author's Note:**

> Referencing Bill's seven part series 'The Line' available on YouTube (at least in the US) and highly recommended for any Hader fans out there if you haven't seen it.

Sweating with his head back against the red brick wall, Josh didn’t notice Gwendolyn’s approach until she called out from across the street. “Josh! Hey!”

Cobalt eyes snapping open, a wide grin blossomed over John’s pink lips and he hopped up, the Telepathic Triplets of Cybar launching into their inane countdown the moment his black New Balance struck out toward her smiling face. “Hey.” Josh looped a firm arm around her robe covered waist, planting a kiss on her forehead. “How are you?”

“Great.” Rubbing his little belly, Gwendolyn and Josh looked both ways before scurrying back across the street to the Cobble Hill Cinema. “Sorry I couldn’t get off work for the other nights. Thanks for waiting here.” Gwendolyn gestured to the slumped group of men and smoothed a hand over her hair, artfully formed into a large crimson bun on either side of her head. “Sweet.” She stuck out her lower lip and nodded appraisingly as she leaned between Josh and Duffy. “Front of the line. Nice.”

“Hey, no cuts!” A slovenly man in an ancient Future Space t-shirt scrambled to his feet, pushing up his glasses. “She can’t just waltz in here with less than 24 hours to go and butt ahead!”

“Yeah!” Slender friend rising to join him, he hitched a thumb over his shoulder. “No fair! Besides…” Sneering at Gwendolyn, he raised an eyebrow. “Probably not a real fan, anyway. I bet you’ve only watched the movies.”

Chuckling, his companion crossed his chubby arms and studied the marquee. “Yeah, why don’t you get a ticket for  _ Sex and the City  _ instead? You fake nerd chicks are the worst.”

Josh took half a step forward, muscle in his sharp jaw flashing as he clenched his teeth. But Gwendolyn laid a hand on his firm chest and slipped in front of him. Green gaze glinting, she arched an auburn eyebrow. “Salamonosk-Procurum! Vosk an Vadoh adh infernuhm inutiliah eth fragmehn quisquiliaruhm?”

“Uhhh…” The two men looked quizically between one another, swallowing before the smaller one piped up. “Oh, um...we...I don’t...speak Arkahn…”

“Thought not.” Gwendolyn narrowed her eyes, blood red lip curling. 

One of the men cast a nervous glance at Josh and frowned. “Um, what did she say?”

“Trust me.” Josh gave Gwendolyn’s waist an admiring squeeze. “You don’t wanna know.” 

Stepping back into place, one of the guys weakly lifted an arm in their direction as Gwendolyn untied her robe. “Still, she...we’ve been waiting over a week...she shouldn’t be able to jump ahead.”

Gwendolyn dropped the fabric, revealing the scanty silver bikini of the lead female protagonist, Princess Laniyah. “I’m sorry, what was that?” Hand on her voluptuous hip, Gwendolyn turned with a challenging glower.

Josh barely suppressed his giggles as the other guys openly stared at Gwendolyn’s body, positive most of them rarely spent time near a beautiful, half naked woman outside of Comic Con. “She...she can stay.” The two contenders slowly slid back to the wall, eyes glued to Gwendolyn’s curves.

Hunkering down against the sun-warmed wall, Gwendolyn tucked herself into Josh’s solid chest and he plucked at the strap of her bikini with a smirk. “Wasn’t expecting this…” Sapphire eyes soaking in her creamy flesh, Josh leaned in, pink lips close to her ear as he lowered his flinty voice to a whisper. “You’ve only worn it for me in the bedroom before…”

“Yeah, well…” Gwendolyn gave his thick thigh a squeeze, scooting closer. “I thought it would be fun. Plus, you’ve been waiting out here so long. I’ve had to spend so many nights alone…” Dipping in, she exhaled on his neck, Josh’s cock twitching as Gwendolyn’s fingers trickled over his beige shorts and down his exposed knee. “It’s been pretty lonely.”

Swallowing hard, Josh’s big hand trailed to her hip. “Yeah…” Josh peeked over at Duffy and saw he was absorbed in a Future Space comic. Voice the glimmer of a whisper, he snuck a kiss below Gwendolyn’s ear. “I wish we could go somewhere…”

“Well…” Gwendolyn shrugged. “Why don’t we just buy two tickets to the next showing? Get in the back row…” Tongue to her teeth, she made her red eyebrows dance.

Sighing heavily, Josh shook his head. “We can’t. Those guys…” Tilting his square chin back at The Triplets, Josh rolled his eyes. “They start a countdown as soon as you step out of line. Won’t let us be gone for more than five minutes or we’ll lose our spot.”

“What?” Gwendolyn looked back at them over her shoulder. “That’s so stupid.”

“Yeah, I know.” Nodding, Josh removed his black and white Future Space hat so as not to bonk Gwendolyn in the forehead before capturing her lips briefly. “Too bad…”

Frowning, Gwendolyn scrunched her fingers through Josh’s shaggy brown hair. “Yeah, it really is…” She touched a kiss to his sharp jaw, making a small noise of discontent. “I’m so hot for you right now, it would barely take longer than that anyway…”

“Damn…” Nose flaring, Josh restrained the urge to slide his hand over Gwendolyn’s plump ass, forming a reluctant fist instead. “It’s gonna be a long night…”

As it turned out the two of them along with Duffy were able to amuse themselves with a few rounds of Future Space trivia, as well as speculating on different theories surrounding the final chapter, before darkness descended and Josh shook out his orange sleeping bag. Toeing off his sneakers, Josh climbed in, fluffing the beige pillow behind him before Gwendolyn laid down. 

“Oops, hang on.” Half on the sidewalk, Gwendolyn had no choice but to toss a leg over Josh’s narrow waist, tucking the sheer panel of fabric attached to her costume in behind as she nestled down onto his firm chest.

Josh adjusted her with his strong arms until Gwendolyn was situated above him in a position that, while not comfortable, would at least be sleepable for one night. “Okay. We got this. Hold on.” Biting his lip in concentration, Josh’s hand groped blindly for the zipper, sealing the two of them in burrito-like between the puffy layers.

“Wow…” Snuggling down and using Josh’s pec and her bun as a pillow, Gwendolyn sighed. “Maybe I should’ve brought my own sleeping bag.”

“Nah.” Josh closed the circle of his arms around her, kissing the top of Gwendolyn’s red head. “Better this way.”

Others in the line following suit, collapsing into their chairs or crawling into tents for the night, Gwendolyn sought the warmth of Josh’s broad frame, nuzzling into his neck. “I didn’t think it would get so cold out here tonight.”

“Yeah.” Josh murmured, pink lips gracing her cheek. “It’s been brutal during the day, but gets pretty chilly after dark.” Allowing his big hand to wander now that no one could see its journey, Josh gave Gwendolyn’s round ass an appreciative squeeze and she chuckled.

The marquee lights extinguished, replaced by blue moonlight as the snores of their fellow fans filled the air. Occasionally pedestrians strolled past, but as the hours ticked by, the space between their footsteps expanded and one could almost forget they laid upon a sidewalk in downtown Los Angeles.

Gwendolyn squirmed. Blinking her eyes open, she studied Josh’s face in the dimness, his chiseled features somehow crisper, more defined. Riding the slow, even wave of Josh’s rising chest, the slickness between Gwendolyn’s thighs provoked her to stretch her lips to his joined ear. “Josh, are you awake?”

Whisper tickling him alert, Josh raised his head. “Mmhmm, what’s up?” Josh started to reach for the zipper. “You need to get out? There’s a restroom we can use around the corner at the all night grocery store. I’ll walk you.”

“No…” Shaking her head, Gwendolyn’s hand slithered down, palming Josh’s soft cock over his shorts and arching an eyebrow.

Sapphire eyes widening, Josh looked over his shoulder before leaning into Gwendolyn with a harried whisper. “Here?”

Gwendolyn poked up her head. “I think everyone’s asleep…” Snapping the button open, she lowered Josh’s zipper as silently as possible. “It’ll be okay, right?”

“Yeah, just…” Josh took Gwendolyn, shifting until they laid side by side, before glancing cautiously back at the slumbering line of men. “I think if we just use our hands no one will notice.”

Nodding eagerly, Gwendolyn parted her legs as much as the restrictive material would allow. “Yeah. Yeah, okay.” 

Using his wide back as a shield. Josh linked their lips together, hand seeking Gwendolyn’s pillowy thighs in the warm darkness beneath the sleeping bag. Slipping the silver spandex of her costume aside, his lengthy fingers pet over the lips of her pussy as Gwendolyn snuck into his boxers.

“Wait…” Struggling to retract her arm, Gwendolyn spit in her hand before creeping back down. “Okay, there we go.” 

Josh stiffened as Gwendolyn’s fingers enclosed around his cock, pulling gently as they sought the relief of one another’s mouths. Sighing audibly when he discovered how wet Gwendolyn was, Josh experly circled her clit and she rocked into his touch, free hand sneaking up the back of his gray t-shirt to caress his pale skin.

Josh thrust into the alluring clutch of Gwendolyn’s palm, intertwining their tongues and making his first direct pass over her clit with a large thumb. Breaking away, Josh’s supple lips kissed a path down her neck. Gwendolyn wasn’t accustomed to Josh’s abundance of stubble, but parted from his razor, it was inevitable, and she found the chafe exhilarating as he nipped at her ear.

Rubbing her thumb firmly into his frenulum, a deep hum of contentment buzzed through Josh’s solid chest and he wiggled his other arm up to massage Gwendolyn’s breast over the fabric of her costume. Gwendolyn squeezed the begging head of his cock generously, emboldening Josh to tug her bikini down, big hand pawing and tweaking at her hardening nipples as he fiddled her swelling clit in earnest.

“Yeah…” Gwendolyn gasped lightly, rutting into his touch. “So good.”

Nodding insistently, Jost twisted his wrist, sinking two fingers deep inside of her drenched pussy to plunge against her g-spot as he continued to spin his thumb over her delicate nub. “Yeah?” Josh whispered through his rounded teeth, hips driving into Gwendolyn’s pumping hand. “Like that?”

“Fuck…” Green eyes squinching in a semblance of agony, Gwendolyn bobbed her head feverishly with a sharp intake of breath. “Yes...fuck...right there…” 

Folding against him, Gwendolyn exhaled into Josh’s vast shoulder, fisting a hand in his navy sleeve to avoid moaning. “Josh, I…” Gwendolyn panted into his ear, yanking his thick cock furiously. “I want you to fuck me so bad.”

“Fuck, me too.” Smothering her mouth with his, Gwendolyn’s pussy fluttered around his fingers and Josh’s cock throbbed with yearning. “But we...we can’t.” Josh swallowed, oceanic eyes studying her apprehensively. “Right?”

Gwendolyn craned over to examine the others, spotting nothing but unconscious, quiet fans. “I mean…” Licking her lips, Gwendolyn shrugged. “We’re...we’re both so close. Right? It...it won’t take long. I…” Viridescent gaze locking into his, Gwendolyn offered a coy smile. “I think it’ll be okay. No one will know…”

“Yeah…” Coming up on his toes, Josh braced an elbow and pushed against Gwendolyn’s hip to guide her underneath him. “Yeah, okay.”

Gwendolyn could barely bring her knees up as she opened her legs beneath Josh, both of them casting one last anxious look to the sleeping line as he swiped the head of his cock over the dewy folds of her pussy before sharing a nod.

Penetrating her warm, moist depths, Josh only half managed to hold back the groan that rumbled through his firm chest and forced his face into the crook of Gwendolyn’s neck with a gasped, “Fuck!”

High, tittering moan leaking from her lips, Gwendolyn immediately bore forward onto his massive cock, clutching at Josh’s love handles and exhaling into his ear, “Yes!”

Josh crammed an arm between them, resolved to looping the other up over Gwendolyn’s head to make room as his fingers thrummed over her clit and he swiveled his hips forward. 

“Josh.” Gwendolyn played with the chestnut tresses at the nape of his neck, green gaze sliding to the right as he undulated above her. “Just...hard and fast.”

His eyes black in the night and glimmering with need, Josh scanned her face. “Alright.” Cradling Gwendolyn’s forehead to his own, his thumb spun over her engorged clit and he began driving forward. “Yeah…”

Tailbone smacking the sidewalk, Gwendolyn knew she would be viciously sore tomorrow trying to sit through the movie, but couldn’t bring herself to care as her thighs fused to Josh’s pummeling hips and she clamped a hand over her mouth to dampen her moans. 

Gwendolyn shook violently beneath him and Josh nailed her into the concrete, heedless of the consequences as she cinched around his hammering cock and he lost himself in the hot grip of her body. 

Even muffled with her fingers and jamming her face into his mountainous shoulder, Josh could tell the sound threatening to escape Gwendolyn’s straining throat was his own name. Spurred on, Josh raced over her clit and crashed forward, pink lips growling directly into Gwendolyn’s ear. “Fuck yeah, Gwen…” Gwendolyn constricted around him again, and Josh heard a seam of the sleeping bag rip as her quaking leg shot out unexpectedly. “I love making you cum. Fuck...Fuck!”

Shrieks wheezing through her nose, Gwendolyn threw her pelvis forward with a frenzy as her eyes stuck in her skull, feet pushing herself up and down on the pavement as she desperately sought friction.

A flicker in his periphery and Josh snapped his head to the side. He could’ve swore he saw the eyes of one of The Triplets glowing, but when he looked all three slept peacefully on, and Gwendolyn squeezing around his sensitive cock drew his attention back with a wavering groan.

“Fuck, Gwen…” Josh uttered, snaking his powerful arms up, grateful Gwendolyn wouldn’t judge him for hanging onto the buns of her scarlet hair, more than aware by now what the costume did for his libido as Josh flexed his toes against the fabric and frantically humped. 

“Fuck...fuck...I’m gonna cum, Gwen. Yes! Fuck!” Whimpering into her open mouth, Josh’s prominent eyebrows gathered, sculpted jaw dangling with his last few erratic circuits before he froze. Pelvis jumping and gritting his teeth to hold back the whining grunt, Josh filled Gwendolyn’s pulsing pussy with hot cum, writhing above her as the tremors of her body zapped his tender cock.

“Yes...fuck...fuck…” Josh nodded fervently, kissing over Gwendolyn’s sweaty skin as his hips continued to rock forward of their own volition.

Breasts heaving, Gwendolyn laced her fingers through Josh’s damp brunette tresses, lips tracing his sturdy jaw. “Fuck...so good…”

“Yeah…” Josh fused their mouths together for an impassioned kiss, frowning when they parted. “Oh damn…” Picking at an errant red strand coming loose near the crown of Gwendolyn’s head, Josh tried to wind it back around the bun. “Sorry. I messed up your hair…”

Chuckling, Gwendolyn patted his scratchy cheek. “Worth it.”

Josh removed himself, Gwendolyn holding her panties to the side beneath the confines of the sleeping bag so the sticky liquid would leak out of her beneath them and not onto her costume. Putting themselves back together without being exposed turned out to be far more arduous, bumping elbows and muttering apologies before Gwendolyn finally found herself atop Josh once more, pleasantly sleepy as his fingers danced over her hip. 

“Excited for the movie?” Gwendolyn squeezed Josh’s little love handle with a yawn. “We’ve been waiting a long time. Who knows...it might be disappointing.”

“Nah.” Smiling, Josh held Gwendolyn close. “We get to watch it together. It’s gonna be great.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read! If you enjoyed this story, please leave a comment or come say hi on tumblr at fandomtransmandom. I also accept requests!


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